the old-school guestbook archives
my amazon wish list... my favorite astrologer... my favorite artist... yerba mate revolution! erowid: a travel guide for interior journeys... no more war: MoveOn.org United for Peace and Justice True Majority seek the truth: Common Dreams Unamerican Activities The Nation people I adore, diaries I read: rev.raikes ariana cubiclegirl epiphany glitter333 laurakay wammo the music: the asylum street spankers backyard tire fire blue highway bill camplin wendy colonna freedom tribe joules graves guy forsyth band hamsa lila hanuman libby kirkpatrick leftover salmon pamela means medeski martin & wood the motet the nice outfit nickel creek open road rose polenzani railroad earth south austin jug band string cheese incident taarka tha musemeant the devil makes three tim o'brien band trolley wild sage keller williams yonder mountain string band |
my weary bones ~ april 16, 2001 - 10:37 p.m. exhausted, again. I've been running myself too hard on too little sleep for too long. I'm living in this land of extremes, the pendulum swinging me to one extreme and then the other. I'm a bit of a creature of light and darkness lately. I'm learning a lot about my addictive nature. I'm trying to make friends with it, learn what it has to teach me. I'm watching what happens inside me when I reach for something, or when I don't. this last day or so I've been mostly reaching. I spent the weekend in a land of cravings. fear, lonliness, insecurity... it all feeds the cravings. cravings are the song and dance I do instead of being present in this moment of my life. I get tired. I get tired of always doing things the hard way. of being strong. of always trying to make the right choices. I'm like a teenager, fighting with bared teeth against the voices that tell me how I should live my life. I fight even though the voices are coming from my own heart. I'm looking at myself hard and trying to be kind.
(((rings))) |