the old-school guestbook archives
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so over it ~ June 9, 2003 - 10:57 p.m. I'm over it, you know? there's a bit of residual sadness, but it's really only evidenced by a tendency to occasional deep sighs. I'm feeling pretty strong and happy, in general. kind of a hey, dodged that bullet! kind of feeling. because, after all, I never did trust him. I knew he was lying, it was just a question of when I'd find out. and I found out before I lost my heart. yes, I was hurt, angry, disappointed. but whatever. it helps that he came over the other night, and we just hung out and talked for hours. he kept saying things that pissed me off, and confirmed that he's not a man I want to be involved with. and at the same time, we were able to laugh together, to enjoy each other's company. I thought I'd lose his friendship when I ended our lovership, but it looks like I can have my cake and eat it too. I get to keep the friend. that's a good thing. and I just spent an hour or so sitting on his tuk-tuk, goofing around with him and his friends the way we always have. that was the part I was going to miss the most. the sex, frankly, was not that good. not bad, mind you, just not mind-blowing. but then, I've had some damn good sex. I think my standards are rather high. so I've spent the last couple of days just lounging around the house, and intermittantly doing housework in preparation for vietnam boy's visit. assuming he's still coming. he's supposed to be here sometime between the 10th and the 12th. I asked him for an exact date, so that I could know to be around the house, and I haven't heard back. so it's a bit nervous-making, not really knowing when he might potentially show. and I don't really feel like my house is presentable yet. but it's getting there. as usual, I'm not sleeping enough. and I have a sore throat. so I'm going to go home, and hopefully get some rest. we'll see what tomorrow brings.
(((rings))) |