the old-school guestbook archives
my amazon wish list... my favorite astrologer... my favorite artist... yerba mate revolution! erowid: a travel guide for interior journeys... no more war: MoveOn.org United for Peace and Justice True Majority seek the truth: Common Dreams Unamerican Activities The Nation people I adore, diaries I read: rev.raikes ariana cubiclegirl epiphany glitter333 laurakay wammo the music: the asylum street spankers backyard tire fire blue highway bill camplin wendy colonna freedom tribe joules graves guy forsyth band hamsa lila hanuman libby kirkpatrick leftover salmon pamela means medeski martin & wood the motet the nice outfit nickel creek open road rose polenzani railroad earth south austin jug band string cheese incident taarka tha musemeant the devil makes three tim o'brien band trolley wild sage keller williams yonder mountain string band |
everyday miracles ~ September 8, 2003 - 2:11 a.m. russell. such a joy to find him again. we made a date for tea on friday, and didn't end it until this afternoon. it's been a delightful weekend. we met up at the javah house, my favorite neighborhood coffeehouse in oakland. talked and talked and talked. went to see thirteen, which we both liked a lot. went for thai food at the late-night noodle house in berkeley, where I broke my fast on some tom kah soup. back to ariana's house, where we talked all night. I didn't decide if I was going to make love to him until past sunrise. when I did, it was delicious. this connection of ours, so strong and good. we are deep friends, and true. we've been through hell and high water together. we talk and talk, about our hearts, about our lives, about the nature of the universe and the state of our society. this is what we have always done, this is what we have always had, apart from that long stretch where we had only distance, only separation. three years later, it still feels as natural to fall into his arms as it did when this began. all those years ago. something like five years we've known each other now. and three since we've been lovers. two since we've spoken. until friday night. and it feels as if this connection has never been broken. has only lived, for a time, underground. and here we are in the light of day. we are not in love, it's not that kind of passion. we simply love each other. really, truly, deeply. we understand each other better than most people understand either of us. we are friends more true than most. friends to the end. and lovers, in this time, in this way. knowing that I am leaving, it is simple, unfettered, undefined. this is easy. last night, curled in each other's arms, exhausted, and me fighting off a cold... I was drifting, dreaming, nearly slipping away when he whispered you know I love you. and I do, know, with all of my being. and what an everyday miracle it feels to be in his arms again, to feel a love this simple and complex, this strong and warm and known. be neither cynical about love, for amidst all aridity and disenchantment, it is perennial as the grass... after so much time feeling myself the lioness, stalking alone down this road, I awake to find I am surrounded by love. a whole tribe of brothers and sisters have I, a whole family of lovers, a whole universe to hold me in its arms. it is always worth waking to the sunrise , warm and safe in the knowledge that you are not alone, after all. because these miracles of the heart, they happen every day.
(((rings))) |