the old-school guestbook archives
my amazon wish list... my favorite astrologer... my favorite artist... yerba mate revolution! erowid: a travel guide for interior journeys... no more war: MoveOn.org United for Peace and Justice True Majority seek the truth: Common Dreams Unamerican Activities The Nation people I adore, diaries I read: rev.raikes ariana cubiclegirl epiphany glitter333 laurakay wammo the music: the asylum street spankers backyard tire fire blue highway bill camplin wendy colonna freedom tribe joules graves guy forsyth band hamsa lila hanuman libby kirkpatrick leftover salmon pamela means medeski martin & wood the motet the nice outfit nickel creek open road rose polenzani railroad earth south austin jug band string cheese incident taarka tha musemeant the devil makes three tim o'brien band trolley wild sage keller williams yonder mountain string band |
I can write about sex, just not about 9/11... ~ September 11, 2002 - 1:04 a.m. weird, looking at the date on this thing. weird that september 11th used to be just another date. something kinda funnyweird about my memory of that day: I was in vermont, with heather and andre and mikro, listening to the public radio station, and the announcer said something like "one thing is for certain-- tuesday, september 9th, is a date that will live in history." he screwed up the date. I can't really write about september 11th. I don't know how. when I think about it, I don't even know what to feel. it's too complicated. there's too much. if I was grieving someone, I might know what to say. grief is a focus. but I'm not. august and I were talking about this tonight, and my memories of that day are so surreal. I was in such a peaceful place, that mountaintop in vermont, surrounded by people I love. and I knew I needed to contact my brother and my sister-in-law in new york, but I knew that they were okay. I worried more about my muslim friends, my male friends of draftable age. but even then, I didn't know what to think. except maybe: so. it's really happening. that's basically what jeffrey and I said to each other when we got through to each other on the phone. we'd been expecting something like that, for a while. I still don't know how to write about this. let's take a hard conversational left... I'm up at mount madonna again, after spending the last couple of nights at patrick's. I've released some kind of major block with him. I'm filled with sexual energy, for the first time in a while, and it feels so good to be easy in my body again. I'd really almost forgotten just how powerful my sex drive actually is. and I'm not so scared, anymore, of letting him in. it helps that this is a deeply loose and easy connection. we are friends and lovers with no expectations. creating safe space for each other and just goofing around. it's fun, it's sweet. and I'm leaving for southeast asia in something like three weeks. it's starting to feel real. I freaked out a little bit tonight, feeling unprepared for the classroom visits I'll be making along the way... but you know what? it'll be great. here's the scene for the southeast asia deal: TravelingEd is a new santa cruz-based non-profit that is sending me to trek through singapore, malaysia, thailand, laos, and vietnam for six weeks. I'll be visiting schools and all kinds of other cool places, as well as just exploring and having adventures... I'll be posting travel diaries and digital photos to the web, and schoolkids in the u.s. will be following my journey and studying a curriculum based on it. very cool, yes? it's like my mom said: it sounds like you've been training for this job for a long time. and you know what? I get to spend something like half of that time in thailand. remember last year when I decided I needed to go to thailand? I finally manifested it. pretty damn cool. I'm deeply curious to see what's waiting for me there... in other news, I finished my protest poem about the stupid downtown ordinance. I was going to perform it tomorrow, but realizing that september 11th is happening made me reconsider. the energy downtown's gonna be weird tomorrow. I think I may just stay up on the mountain and garden. and dream about thailand.
(((rings))) |