the old-school guestbook archives
my amazon wish list... my favorite astrologer... my favorite artist... yerba mate revolution! erowid: a travel guide for interior journeys... no more war: MoveOn.org United for Peace and Justice True Majority seek the truth: Common Dreams Unamerican Activities The Nation people I adore, diaries I read: rev.raikes ariana cubiclegirl epiphany glitter333 laurakay wammo the music: the asylum street spankers backyard tire fire blue highway bill camplin wendy colonna freedom tribe joules graves guy forsyth band hamsa lila hanuman libby kirkpatrick leftover salmon pamela means medeski martin & wood the motet the nice outfit nickel creek open road rose polenzani railroad earth south austin jug band string cheese incident taarka tha musemeant the devil makes three tim o'brien band trolley wild sage keller williams yonder mountain string band |
all of what I need ~ September 16, 2007 - 5:30 p.m. I should be writing more... there's so much happening, life is such a blur. and I need to be writing, I can feel it, but I've been out of the mode for so long, and when I'm out of the mode, it's just so hard to get myself back into it. my job is the big thing in my life right now, and it feels so good to have a job that I love again. I've gone back to being a flight attendant, a surreal world which I find oddly, deeply satisfying. there are so many ways to be of service on an airplane. and there's something about being up in the air... maybe because I'm an air sign. I feel very much at peace up there, at home with it. even turbulence rocks me like a baby. they say in the industry that flying gets into your blood, and I think that's true. what's true also is that it feels good to have something solid and professional again, with benefits and challenges. something I can sink my teeth into and do really well. I'm working for the hottest, hippest new airline around. I won't tell you who, but if you know the industry at all, you know who I mean. being in on the ground floor of something so cool is fantastic. not only that, I just got promoted to lead, the flight attendant in charge of the flight. more responsibility, more money. at most airlines it would take ages for that to happen, because of all the people senior to you. but all of us, hired on at the beginning, we've got it made and we know it. we are the top of the seniority list, and as time goes on, it's just going to get better. so my work is taking up a lot of my focus, time and energy right now, but I'm wanting to make sure I don't let that be all. I need to keep dancing, keep writing, keep connected to my spiritual life and my interior world. it all needs to be integrated, so that my life is not only structured, but alive with light. and love, love is good too. I may have lost ariana, it's true, but things between jesse and I are better than they've ever been. he's finally seeing me as his girlfriend, and seems less prone to nervously scoping out his nearest exits. it's true there's another girl he wants to marry someday, and he'll never ever want to get serious with me, but what we have is really sweet and true, and I'm really grateful to have him in my life. I'd like one more lover, to balance me out. a woman, likely, but the right man could light up my heart as well. I'm not actively seeking, but dwelling in openness. trying to make sure that I get all of what I need.
(((rings))) |