the old-school guestbook archives
my amazon wish list... my favorite astrologer... my favorite artist... yerba mate revolution! erowid: a travel guide for interior journeys... no more war: MoveOn.org United for Peace and Justice True Majority seek the truth: Common Dreams Unamerican Activities The Nation people I adore, diaries I read: rev.raikes ariana cubiclegirl epiphany glitter333 laurakay wammo the music: the asylum street spankers backyard tire fire blue highway bill camplin wendy colonna freedom tribe joules graves guy forsyth band hamsa lila hanuman libby kirkpatrick leftover salmon pamela means medeski martin & wood the motet the nice outfit nickel creek open road rose polenzani railroad earth south austin jug band string cheese incident taarka tha musemeant the devil makes three tim o'brien band trolley wild sage keller williams yonder mountain string band |
up and down the road ~ March 19, 2002 - 1:06 a.m. tired. running on not much sleep today. I got up early (for me = 9 a.m.), and rode my bike up to the city to meet with the dentist who is taking her board exam and looking for subjects. it was a gorgeous ride. I took highway one, which runs along the coast, cliffs and beaches and great sweeping stretches of ocean. everything drenched in sunshine. ah. this is why I learned to ride. and the dentist actually gave me good news-- my teeth are too nice for her to use for her board exam. not enough tartar, no cavities. that thing I thought was a cavity is just normal enamel wear, apparently. she said my teeth were in amazing shape, and that I must be doing really good "home care". it's been four years since I saw a dentist, and she said it looked more like six months. and I do try to take good care of my teeth. I mean, I'd like to keep them, you know? and it's been a while since I had a job with insurance. a job of any kind, really. so I brush twice a day, I floss once a day, I floss under the bridge that replaces my front teeth, lost to a drunken piggyback riding accident when I was sixteen. I rinse with tea tree oil. and apparently, that's doing the job. I feel good about it, partly because dental hygiene is a thing for me. I had lousy dental habits when I was growing up. I'd go for whole weeks without brushing. and then, as an adult, I noticed that that was one of the things to go when I was badly depressed. I went through a bad time when I was living with clare in a dark little trailer on the clown ranch from hell (oh yes there's stories to be told)-- and I'd forget to change clothes, bathe, or brush my teeth for days in a row. so it's something I try to stay on top of, now. I have my bedtime rituals. I take care of my teeth, I wash my face, I meditate. and I feel like all those things send a signal to myself that you are worth taking care of. even in all those little ways. and I feel better for taking care of myself. even when my whole life's in chaos, at least I can have clean teeth. after the dentist, I discovered that there's a second herbivore, a vegan restaurant I love in the city. who knew there was one on divisidero? so I had yummy vegan lunch on the deck in the sunshine, and I found ten bucks on the ground, so I got to be the chick who eats a nine-dollar meal and tips ten. I've always wanted to be that chick. when you're waiting tables, something unexpected like that can give a kick to your whole day. and I liked my waiter, with his stretched lobes and fluffy red devil horns. gotta love herbivore. then I rode back down the coast, and even though my butt was tired, I dragged myself down to the library to print out the application to do a yoga residency at mount madonna. and you know what else? I came home and filled it out. it's funny, things like that used to be really hard for me. filling out applications for stuff. especially for things I really want. I feel like I've gottent through some kind of block. I mean, it's still hard sometimes, and it still takes me a few days sometimes, but more and more I find that I can just sit down and do it. gotta love that. making shit happen. I'm feeling kind of powerless and empowered at the same time. I'm still bummed about not getting the house on blessing lane, but I'm feeling hopeful that my direction will come clear soon, and that it will be a good direction. that I have the power to make good things happen in my life. we'll see.
(((rings))) |